Re: Wide Stance
perhaps if you had to take a major major shit, you'd have spread a little wider? the body will never know its limits unless put in a situation that requires it to be tested to that length. probably wouldn't recommend this during business hours...heh
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Re: Wide Stance
Your conclusions, because they are based on impirical data, are infallible.
"2. He must have either removed his pants, or he was wearing MC Hammer-style parachute pants. No matter how long your legs are, you're only able to spread them as wide as your waistband will allow."
In response to the above statement: I doubt he was wearing MC Hammer pants, which leads me to conclude the obvious. He was not sitting on the toilet with his pants down in order to take a shit, but, he was sitting on the toilet with his pants in their upright position trying to attract the attention of the man next to him. And I agree with you, this seems to me to be all the evidence we need to conclude that the wide stance claim is complete b.s. Where to go from here I do not know.
Excellent post btw.
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Wide Stance
This might be politics, but I think it has more to do with pooping technique, so I'm including it here. Mods, obviously feel free to move it if you think it's appropriate
I was talking with someone here at my office about the whole Larry Craig thing, and it led me to conduct a little experiment. The opportunity presented itself to have a seat in our restroom, which has stalls that seem to me to be pretty standard for public restrooms. I attempted to replicate a wide enough stance that I could touch the foot of the person in the next stall (there was no one actually in there at the time, for what it's worth).
Two things became immediately apparent:
1. Larry Craig must be a mountain of a man -- I had trouble even getting my foot under the next stall without really stretching, let alone all the way over to where the other dude's foot would be.
2. He must have either removed his pants, or he was wearing MC Hammer-style parachute pants. No matter how long your legs are, you're only able to spread them as wide as your waistband will allow.
Anyway, as if there was any serious question as to whether his "I have a wide stance" explanation held any water, my investigation reveals that it's bullshit.
You're welcome.
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