taking some time out

[Micko]

Re: taking some time out

Can you come back to me asap Dom

[thebanned1]

Re: taking some time out

i,m fucking sick of this place, it's completely fucked, simple essentials needed for everyday life are getting out of the reach of everyone, simple things like toilet roll for example, the stuff every one can afford is so bad that you have to use half a roll just to wipe you're arse right once, that's all going into the sewage system and costing the system huge sums of money to process which is costing scottish water a huge amount of their budget and that is why tap water has become so shit, smells like bleach and tastes horrible because they can no longer afford to pay for the right stuff to make it pure, then you have to go buy bottled water which is so expensive and so dirty and not even filtered or anything, e coli or anything could be in that stuff, they don't even check it, most of that shit is just tap water anyway put into plastic bottles that is fucking up the planet more than anything, the water is messing with people's hair and skin and causing them to become conscious of their looks which is probably why they are sitting in front of their tv's or computers all day and not going out as much as they can and driving people to depression and all sorts of other health problems, this could be one of the reasons why all the shops in the main street are closing down, well one of the reasons and why things like internet shopping and supermarkets are becoming so big because everyone is either going to a one stop shop for everything or sitting on their arse and getting everything delivered right to their door just look at how many people have started to use home deliveries from supermarkets, it's keeping the royal mail going, i was in the sorting office for one day in my town and i swear everything i touched ,all the boxes and parcels were from amazon, that told me a lot, probably more than it should of, things like cd's were 2 and 3 quid cheaper ( including delivery ) than it would of cost for people to go out on the main street and buy it themselves, for me to buy the music i like it would of cost me a good £10 in train fair plus the cost of a cd for some music i could even listen too before i bought it, it has hit record shops hard,take virgin for example, when i was at uni i had to travel into glasgow and i was buying music from there all the time simply because it was the only place ( glasgow ) where the shops were and i was already in the city anyway, people couldn't really afford to travel into the city every time to buy things like music or dvd's and this was the only place where those shops were based because they were spending so much money on trying to live as good as they can and when the computer and internet came along piracy just got huge because everyone loves to feel good and everyone loves something for free, it's not because people couldn't afford to buy the media it was because the only places they could get it from was costing too much to get too, once you get into the habit of getting things for free then why would you bother to start paying for it again ? i,ve sat on forums like this for over a decade and downloaded so much stuff over the years, far too much stuff to go through in my life and it has damaged the scene more than anything because although there is some good music in those sets some dj's don't even bother giving you a tracklist for you the people to go out and buy the music they are hearing, the dj scene is fucking itself over big time, dj's are getting music years in advance and playing it to people and by the time the people find out the name of the song they like it all old and no one buys it, by that time people have already downloaded more music for free and have moved onto something that sounds different, there is so much choice out there and it is getting better and better all the time but the people at the top are not helping the artists by feeding people who are willing to buy the music the names of the song or artists and that is driving a lot of talent in music to move onto something else because they are not making any money from it, the scene could last a life time but it's killing itself for the reasonsi,ve just mentioned

[thebanned1]

Re: taking some time out

sent you a reply in two parts again

[Micko]

Re: taking some time out

Hi Dom,

I've just sent you a PM

Come back to me asap

[thebanned1]

Re: taking some time out

the more i say the more i,m going to make myself look completely paranoid but there is science in everything we do now, in everything we eat, touch and drink etc, it would be easy to create business by studying the chemicals that are in the food we eat and drink and creating another chemical which reacts with those chemicals to do harm to our bodies, these people know exactly what they are doing, they are in our food, our drink our drugs etc etc, it's an easy target and no one knows just what is in the food we eat or what we put into our body, no one really thinks about it, you buy a piece of fruit or veg from the shop and eat it without even thinking about the chemicals that were used to help it grow or the chemical used to keep predators from harming it, we put this stuff into our body all the time without thinking about it, if you think about what everyone recommends as a balanced diet then it would be easy for science to target those products to create more business for science in the future, bleaching flour for example ? wtf is that all about ? it's probably killing all the good nutrients in it right away, sweeteners in foods that are linked to heart palpitations, chemicals in beers that are linked to cancers to name a few things, these are all harming our body when we put them into it and no one really knows who is behind creating the treatments for fixing these problems and who they are connected to, for all you know companies could be setting up companies in other fields such as food ( and pesticides ) and medicines to create as much money as they can from each other on the fly without anyone even considering it, if you know what you're doing then it's easy to make disease/illness look like a natural occurrence, business is getting fly, the techniques are getting more advanced and people are getting greedy for power

take street drugs for example ( especially in this country ), the drugs are so filthy and cut with everything that you never really knows what is in them, it could be anything, what are they cut with and what is it doing to our body, it would be so easy for business to target that and put harmful chemicals in them that need treatments to fix the health problems, even testing kits could be tampered with to hide the harmful stuff that is in them, who has ever tested a testing kit ? look at how cannabis has changed in the last 30 years as an example, you need to know what you are doing to be able to change it in that way, no street dealer is behind that... crack ? who thought about that one ? how cocaine is made, who the hell thought about mixing all those chemicals together to extract the stuff from the plant, look it up on youtube, its scary, there is something serious behind that one, meth ? created by some basement dwelling scientist that got his knowledge from searching google for a webpage ? i don't think so, these people are creating stuff in advance knowing they have treatments to fix the problems caused by ingesting these substances, they are probably making a fortune from it and it's an easy target because it illegal, look at how ecstasy has change over the years, in the old days one pill would of lasted you all night and when the supply of safrole oil was halted they just either started to cut the shit out of what they had left or just synthesized another way of making it through another chemical process ( i don't know a lot about it ), sitting watching gurners ( it's not even gurning now, it's more like twitches ) on a page on facebook recently made me see just how dangerous it is becoming, pills are getting so strong these days and creating so much damage to the brain, again there is science behind that, some of the hash you used to get in this country was filthy, a quarter ounce used to cost £35 and it was not the best quality but it got worse over the years, i remember ( long time ago now ) the stuff was so bad and dirty that people were paying £35 ( or even £25 ) for a whole ounce, goes all black when you burn it and stuff, that could of been ISIS or anything ( if they existed back then ), that's all years and years of oxygen on the health service and today's weed is even more deadly, thc content is driving people insane at an alarming rate, that's all anti psychotic treatments and hospital ward visits and even that doesn't stop people from smoking it, that just drives you to take more drugs

[thebanned1]

Re: taking some time out

as having a close family member diagnosed with schizophrenic bi-polar disorder, i hope you listen to the doctors who understand your sickness and are only acting in your best interest for a normal healthy life for you.

it's more common than ever now, so is depression and other illnesses, it's easy to blame it on substance abuse all too easily but i,ve seen people who have never touched drugs in their lives go through the system and end up in a cycle of substance abuse due to this, a lot of it can be sorted well with diet but there are other dangers in that as well because you never know just what is in the food you're eating and no one is sure 100% how certain chemicals react with other chemicals, it's probably why cancer is growing at an alarming rate, just look at the shit that is in cigarette's as an example, plastics ? wtf, who in their right mind would want to smoke plastic but once you go down that road it's so addictive and it's hard to stop, most people don't even know half the chemicals that are in things like this and don't even think about what it is doing to their body, when the toxins enter the blood stream and then are mixed with other toxins from god knows where else who knows what that is doing to the body, were surrounded by so much chemicals these days and exposed to so much it's just getting more dangerous

I will say what you had described is almost exactly what was told to me by this person so if it helps any at all, you are not the only person with these thoughts. This is is why it is so quick to be diagnosed because these doctors hear the same story over and over.

i was diagnosed years ago, i,m seeing my doctor soon

also remember, many people have gone through this and have been able to live healthy lifestyles with the proper treatment, so it's not impossible to fix things.

best of luck to you and i hope you find the peace you are looking for.

not impossible to fix things ? you're madder than me lol... you have no idea what you're talking about, people who have never been through it will never understand it.. the drugs are useless and cause all sort of other problems and they don't even fix half the problems at all, they just numb you to a point where you don't care any more, it completely ruins lives more than it helps lives, i first took my first anti psychotic drug in the 90's ( one course of treatment, didn't even go back for more ) and the side effects were still the same some 10-15 years later, patients would of been reporting the same side effects to their doctors for years and no one bother to change the formula or anything, sometimes i think it's deliberate, i saw someone i was in a ward with at one point the other day, guy was only a young guy and he's basically killing himself hard ( smoking cigarette's right to the filter etc ), he didn't even remember me, i had to remind him who i was, the poor guy just looked so fucked up, he couldn't even get a sentence out or nothing

[thebanned1]

Re: taking some time out

i swear i,ve just realized i,m eating myself into an early grave, no omega 3 or 6 for years which means i can't absorb fat soluble vitamins, toes and fingers all affected by this, all the fruit i stopped eat long ago was because it was all soggy, old and rotten with no vitamin content ( cheap and nasty and from all around the world ), drinking heavily for years which was fucking up my digestive system, kebabs, chip shop food and mcdonalds/kfc ( all stuff i couldn't chew properly or digest ), my nails are all ridges and lines ( b3 deficiency i think, you're supposed to get that from bread but flour bleaching probably kills the shit out of that ), dodgy yogurts with sugary sides to go along with it and other nasty cheap dairy produce probably full of all sorts of shit, fried food ( lards and other oils ), drinking too much tap water which probably means i,m taking in too much fluoride, sugary drinks, sweetened drinks, microwave foods that are full of carcinogenic from the plastic they are cooked in the microwave heated up so much that all the nutrients are killed off and meat so hard and chewy that you're never going to digest it... this is all leading to cancer, obesity, diabetes and all sorts of diseases that is killing millions right across the country because it all they can afford to feed themselves with, the cost of living in scotland is even lower than places down south and scotland is suffering hard so god knows what is happening down south, during the brexit debate people were complaining they couldn't get into a hospital or dentist for weeks and they were blaming it on migrants clogging up the system but if you could look at hospital records ( and you can't ) then you would probably see that there is more people from britain going through the system than anyone else because the cost of living is fucking up the country badly and causing all sort of health problems that need sustained expensive treatments and then if those people can't get into work because they are suffering from health problems then they are costing the government/tax payer huge bills in benefits, it's crazy, i was making £20 less a week on benefits than i was making in a full week in work at one point and i was sitting on my arse all day doing nothing, depressed and making myself even more sick that i supposedly was in the first place, the money i,ve cost the system throughout this would frighten you and if this is anything to go by then the future is not very bright for this country at all... people always talk about things like the shortage of affordable housing but if you look at what health is costing the system then you will see why they can't afford to build things like this and that has a knock on affect on people's health as well because they are paying landlords huge sums in rent for houses to live in ( look at house prices in london as an example ) overworking themselves to pay of mortgages and killing themselves in the process because they can't afford decent nutritional food at the same time

some of the houses i have worked in doing jobs were quite expensive housing for this area and the build quality was just shocking, joinery so shocking you would of been lucky it lasted a few years never mind a lifetime, people were paying a fortune in mortgages for these homes only to get into more debt to move to another place because the one they just bought was falling to bits already, the new hospital in this town was built less than 10-15 years ago and when i was in it the place was already falling to bits, windows all broken, sockets coming off the walls,i remember being in the first time and the ward was seriously hot due to the heating on but every time i,ve been in since then it was freezing probably because they couldn't afford to heat the place any more because the repair bill was costing so much, they couldn't even afford to give us more than one blanket which was making it impossible for everyone to sleep and they were having to hand out sleeping pills to every one, this all costs the tax payer so much fucking money, it's getting out of hand and everyone is looking at blaming the easy scapegoats ( i.e. immigration,they were an easy target )... if anything it's business that is killing the country more than anything else because it has become so profit based, every one is trying to make a quick buck as quickly as they can and it's killing people left right and center

[jay813]

Re: taking some time out

as having a close family member diagnosed with schizophrenic bi-polar disorder, i hope you listen to the doctors who understand your sickness and are only acting in your best interest for a normal healthy life for you.

I will say what you had described is almost exactly what was told to me by this person so if it helps any at all, you are not the only person with these thoughts. This is is why it is so quick to be diagnosed because these doctors hear the same story over and over.

also remember, many people have gone through this and have been able to live healthy lifestyles with the proper treatment, so it's not impossible to fix things.

best of luck to you and i hope you find the peace you are looking for.

[thebanned1]

Re: taking some time out

it's the same on the streets, a bottle of wine and a couple of cans ( cigs as well ) or cheap ( poor quality and dangerous ) drugs that keep you going all night ( you don't smoke as much on drugs ), it's damaging to health but it feels so good and like i,ve said previously people are not taught about what it does to their body so they don't really consider the consequences in later life, drugs are getting pretty dangerous, it's why legal highs were banned, i swear i fell for this one big time, drugs were so dirty on the street that people were taking shit loads of those thinking they were getting safer drugs, the most potent drug i,ve ever had in my life was legal and i ended up in hospital after going on a binge on that once, stuff was scary, it took the doctor all day to figure out what was in my blood and they took my blood twice, it's a hard cycle to break drugs, once you have experienced the feel good factor of them it's hard to break away, i still miss a smoke to this day and i,ve only smoked it a few time in about a decade now, even though i went through the mental health system that should of stopped me taking drugs for good but the stuff they were treating me for the problem made me feel so bad that i just wanted to get high again as much as i could to forget, honestly a mental ward breaks you hard, it's a trap, you either react a certain way or another way and the doctors are looking out for the signs of each reaction and read your body language, they either drive you to breaking point and you snap ( then they sedate you ) or they look for the signs that you're hiding something, it's hard to explain but you notice everything right away and you're scared to react either way in case they think you're going mad, there is no way out of it, you're cracked either way, if everyone that goes through it reacts to it in the same way i did then it more or less makes you become a hermit because you see the techniques they use in every day life in public all the time and every time you see something it just reminds you of it, i still remember every single thing from my first experience and that was 13 years ago, it feels like it was yesterday, the second time i just took my ipod and tried to block it out as much as i could, i knew what was coming, 8 weeks at a time in a mental ward and then a good £500 at the end of it curtacy of the tax payer for being in hospital, that is just crazy money not to even mention how much money they spent on treating me with anti psychotics pills, the depot, an injection they give you every 2 weeks instead of giving you pills is so degrading, drop you're trousers i want to stick this big needle into your arse and god it's big, hurts like fuck, god that is nasty, that system is just fucked

[thebanned1]

Re: taking some time out

Thats just life mate, life in Scotland probably hasn't changed much in the last 50 years other than more drugs on the streets.

Nothing that im proud of, but I've taken an obscene amount over the years and as yet, not any worse for it other than missing a few braincells.

Sounds like youre one of the unlucky ones.

Hope you get better soon!

the place is depressing m8, diet is poor and every where you go to for entertainment is all alcoholic beverages, same dj's playing the same music over and over, i never go out in this place at all, the only bars in this town depress the shit out of me, still playing 70's pop hits and other music i hate, when i used to go into the town for a night out it was costing me just about half of my weeks wages just for one night out, in fact probably more than half, the taxi home was a killer and that was the only way to get home at that time of night and even those guys were putting on the same people all the time, i,ll be honest here, if it wasn't for drugs i think that would of died a long time ago but it's the same thing with alcohol, how many people do you see sitting in a bar drinking cola's in a group of friends who are drinking beer, drugs are pretty cheap and make you feel good and last longer than the effects of alcohol, walking into the arches and the first thing that happens is a guy comes up to you and asks you if you want any drugs, if you ask him how much usually it's something like 5 e's for a tenner ( dodgy pills and dangerous yes ) but if you think about it you're never going to enjoy your night in the same way spending the same amount of money on alcohol, drinks in clubs are expensive and everybody needs to save money for living so people try and spend as little as they can while enjoying themselves,£20 on the door, £40 on drinks and £40 on the taxi home and that was years ago, god knows what it's like now or £20 on the door £10 for 5 dodgy drugs and £40 on the taxi home, 30 quid is 30 quid m8

[thebanned1]

Re: taking some time out

thebanned1 - you know where i am.

and what ya gotta do.

hit me up.

i,m fine m8 honestly, just sitting trying to read a couple of books on diet and stuff, finding it hard, never been able to read properly in my life so i have to keep going over and over paragraphs and sentences, can't even spell properly, if it wasn't for spell checking on my browser i would of looked a right idiot every where, i think that is part of the problem with my reading, i,ve always hated the english subject since school, bores me to death, i got through a bachelor in science without ever reading a book and got through a subject in english in college when i just about every word in my essays was misspelled can't even remember if i used word or hand wrote them now if i,m honest but if i used word i was using spell checker for just about every second word, kind of scary if you think about it

[floridaorange]

Re: taking some time out

Good for you for getting out and taking a walk. Going on walks are therapeutic, keep taking small steps in the direction towards physical and mental wellness, you would be surprised how resilient we humans can be. Keep fighting!

[Huggie Smiles]

Re: taking some time out

thebanned1 - you know where i am.

and what ya gotta do.

hit me up.

[GarryX]

Re: taking some time out

i,ve been out walking round my town the past couple of days and twice i,ve been approached my the same young lass, first time she asked me to go into the shop for her, i refused because it was probably to get her either drink or cigarettes, yesterday i was walking along the same street and the same girl asked me if i had a lighter, it reminded me of when i was young and we used to ask adults to go into the shops for us to get either drink or "fags" ( as we call them in scotland ), it's depressing as fuck, seriously, history repeating itself, they kids are out on the street with nothing to do and no where to go and you just know it's going to be a life time of exposure to drugs dealers and alcohol, it's like no one has learned from the mistakes of our generation and hasn't put anything in place to try to teach these people about what could potentially happen and look at what they are spending trying to fix the health problems in us in later life, i think i found a blood clot and had to go to the doctors about it and i now have to go for a scan or something and this was probably due to the drugs i was taking, it wasn't until i was in a mental ward for the second time that i found out the drugs i was taking could do this to your body, i was in my 30's by then, it was far far too late by then, we were never told anything about what drugs could do to our system when we were younger so we never even considered the dangers when we were taking them, they should of taught us this in school years ago and been brutally graphic about it

Thats just life mate, life in Scotland probably hasn't changed much in the last 50 years other than more drugs on the streets.

Nothing that im proud of, but I've taken an obscene amount over the years and as yet, not any worse for it other than missing a few braincells.

Sounds like youre one of the unlucky ones.

Hope you get better soon!

[DIDI]

Re: taking some time out

^^^The problem is at that age you probably wouldn't have believed them